A Letter of Parrots and People

For LL in the UK

Dear Xxx

Sick as a parrot is a good saying. I think it describes how you felt LL when you made the decision you did, to part ... and also to stay with the man you are with now. You questioned your own decision, after the event, and went so far as to admit you had made the wrong choice. Then you made the remark about not being able to leave him because you 'couldn't do that to him', having already done exactly that to me. That told me an awful lot about your standards, or lack of them. Six months with him, two years plus with me. I think you were afraid of his reaction if you had left him. Not the basis for a good relationship. He still holds sway over your life, I'm told.

I am sure over the years that have intervened between then and now, that you have had time to reflect on how poor your decision was. On where you now find yourself, who you have ended up with, and the life style that you have been landed with, as a result. The latter would drive me mad. There is no way I could live as you do. A wasted life, although you may not think so. One where you are 'on your own', in a manner of speaking, for a high proportion of your time. Reflect on my travels, homes etc and tell me you don't have many regrets.

I wonder also how you fill those days in between seeing him. I have had no trouble at all in filling mine with the many interests I have. You, on the other hand, never had any hobbies to speak of, not that many friends either, considering you have spent your whole life in one city.

I recall you once said I had few friends. How little you knew. I wasn't about to introduce you to any of them, either over there in Europe and the UK, or indeed here in the US, until you committed. You never did.

The reasons I looked elsewhere were simple. Your infidelity and lack of commitment.Not much of what you did and said was right, but you were right about one thing. There were/are plenty of other women out there - thank goodness.

Having been with women of various nationalities over the years that have passed since 2004, I can tell you that they certainly differ in their approaches to life and sex. There's the Brits of course. they vary as you no doubt know being one yourself  LL. Generally, I guess I would say that the middle to upper classes are are more about living the sort of life I like and, as you might not expect, far easier with their sexual favors. The lower I went down that social ladder on the odd occasion, the more reserved most were, apart from near the very bottom. My experience there is very limited, thankfully.

I put this down to a general philosophy that life is for living and nowhere was it more obvious than in the upper echelons of the class structure over there. I have only been with what I would term a working class woman once and that woman was you. On the life experience front and how to live it, your horizons were extremely limited - even though I was prepared to widen them for you. Sexually, if it were a scoring matter (pun intended!) then you would be on five out of ten.

Your desires were pretty mundane in bed, no variation and that withdrawal thing was very frustrating. If you had been prepared, and you never signalled that you were, I think I might have got you up to eight out of ten. Compare that with other women around your time e.g. Carole an 8, Denise 9. and Kim 9 (the Norfolk one - not the Californian Kim). There is one exception my general observations on the UK and that was the ethnic Indian women I had relationships with. They were all at least nines and some tens! You were quite 'inexperienced' when I think about it.

So, that's the Brits. Over here it is even more diverse. The Anglo Saxons are pretty much the same as the Brits. The wealthy are far more open (pun intended again👌👈) sexually than some lower down the class hierarchy. The former certainly know how to live life, as do most of the middle class women here, as well There were and are exceptions, of course. Hispanics here are very much more passionate as  one might expect from a Latin race - no exceptions there.

Then to two of my favorite countries France and Italy. The Italian ladies know how to party, that's for sure. Dining, drinking and watching the world go buy and their company and conversation has been a real pleasure. Speaking the language, now, had a lot of advantages and I have many friends there apart from the women I met. As to the bedroom, LL, few if any inhibitions were, or indeed are, evident. - so different to the Anglo Saxon women of here in the US and also the UK.

France...ahh the French women. they really have things 'sorted' and hence I have spent a lot of time there. My places in Nice, Carcassone and Paris lend themselves admirably to that purpose. The French ladies, and I know and have known many, have no hang ups about affairs, married or not. It is almost a given there. Neither are they backward in coming forward and saying what they want. naturally too, they know how to enjoy the good things in life. A perfect combination, for which I will be eternally grateful!!

Scandinavia offers it's own combination of a love of free and easy sex, combined with a strong sense of taking the rest of life quite seriously. There are some beautiful women in Denmark, Sweden and Norway, though and I do speak from fairly extensive experience!

The Dutch and the German ladies are similar, but can certainly let their hair down (and most other things!) when they want to. Beyond that, as you might well imagine they are fairly serious and hardworking. There are exceptions to those generalisations in each and every country.

I will finish on two other points One that you made in a remark to me after we parted and the other a remark you made about yourself.

You said of me that I would be OK after we parted because I am strong. I know you meant the grit or inner strength that people possess. On that matter, it was one of the few things you had right, you were correct. As fond and loving as I was with you, there was no way I was going to let you get to me and drag me down. To make you feel worse, of course I played up to what you expected, rather than how things really were with me. No, you weren't going to make me feel awful because we had parted. I decided you were never worth that and ...I was right. As to the strength, that comes from my character LL and maybe because Highland blood courses through my veins. I, my father and my forebears were and are made of very tough stuff.

You said of yourself, when you told me you didn't want to commit, that you wanted to be free, to be you. That was never achieved then and has not been achieved now. You come from a relatively small town/city and a small family and, as far as I could perceive, you had a small mind and imagination. Your horizons were limited by that background and environment. What I offered you apart from my love and affection was the exact opposite. To travel, to enjoy life and to do what ever you wanted to do. You declined it all.

I made it over here, emigrating as I did, within a year of your demise from our relationship. Marriage would have given you what I now have and all that goes with it. I know for certain you had and have great regrets. Not only your own remark to me about making all the wrong decisions, but things I have heard since. You were 'free' with me, but with him I know you are trapped. Physically, he was never your type and, to top it all, after what you did to me behind my back, he did exactly the same to you some years back. Ironic isn't. What goes round comes round.

I gave you almost limitless opportunities to commit and then to come back, but in each and every case you lacked the courage.

Yours

Xxxxx

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