Green

For LL

I see you will be 'joining' us in the Kingdom of Spain. In recent weeks I have had the pleasure to host my friends and their wives in the UK. Most hadn't seen too much beyond London and  a few bases. So I/we did the historic thing with National Trust visits interspersed by excellent food and wine some of our homes here in the UK and of course use of the plane and cars.

After London we headed west to Cheltenham (BJ knows the place from his 'work' - can't say more). From there by car to Wales and then by plane to get us fairly close to Keswick and our place there. Guess where we landed...

I don't think you have traveled with any of your friends, apart from some trip to Benidorm. Along with our wives, who are also good friends to each other, we had a great time touring, re-introducing them all to English pubs and, by and large, being lucky with the British weather.

For them it's nearly over - they return home to the States early next week while we are doing our European 'thing', as we do every year.Life's good and....a darn more exciting than yours :) I still can't believe you exchanged what you had in the palm of your hand for what you have now. I suspect, that neither  can you, but you are resigned to it and have to live it.

I think green countryside makes you feel good, apparently. With that in mind, here are a few photos from the trips mentioned above ... and from another part of the World.

The next two are about 10 years ago,. but I am sure you will recognize the location LL. All but a distant memory these days

This one below is a friend's garden in Berkshire, UK

Pub - of course! Have to touch base with my roots from time to time:)

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Something entirely different, in the North West -not yours, but mine.

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Of course where I am now is entirely different to both the above locations...and a darn sight warmer!

Somewhere you might recognize LL - :)))

This guy looks fit and brown! Somewhere around Puerto Banus, I believe.

There's another kind of green, associated with envy. I am sure that has reared its head with you a few times over the last nearly 11 years. Not many people give up a great life, then regret their decision but don't have the courage to reverse that position. But then you are one of the few, one of the very foolish ones.

I will leave you with a trip down memory lane...if you can remember that is

This is all new since your time

Have a nice day ma'am.

Ciao

A Lifetime Ago

LL

Time for a wee (my Scots roots still surface occasionally!) update.

Off to Orlando over the weekend as we have a VIP invitation to the Invictus Games. Remember when we were there? Not my scene at all, as you will recall - at least, not the amusement parks. The rest was OK. Then the drive back and hitting that truly great downpour as we drove toward FM. Seems an age, and a lifetime, away now, as does our first trip to Italy.

Talking of which the next move on our part is to Europe for the start of our summer sojourn in the UK, France, Spain, Italy and a couple of other places. For you, it seems Spain beckons again at the end of the month. We might even cross paths, although we are rarely found in the main terminal building these days, due to using our own aircraft.

I suppose I am not surprised by your behavior at the end of the day. The unfaithfulness, the theft etc. With the benefit of having recovered from my bereavement pretty much fully by the end of 2006 - no thanks to you, of course - it enabled me to see you for what you are and were. No need for me to expatiate on that any further as you know how you are, what you are and 'who' you are.

Life allows us choices, thank goodness, but the destiny contained in those choices has to be sought out. It doesn't land in your lap. I was always and am one of those people that makes things happen. If you want something enough you have to go out and get it. That applied to my life before and since. It was your good/bad luck to catch me when I was at the lowest point I have ever been in my life. You never knew the 'real' me, at all. I was just a shadow of my normal being, back then.

They were the downsides, I guess - you, your 'playing away', lies and theft. The upside was that having discovered your infidelity, I felt 'free', so to speak, and met some lovely women over a period of nearly 3 years. So, while it's hard to forgive you for all the things you did, the cowardice etc; I have to thank you for the pleasure you brought me, unintentionally, in the company of all those ladies. Most of all I doubt whether I would have met A, if it had not been for your actions.

Yes, I did love you...then, and you still occupy a corner of my heart, but.....

You 'lost'. I guess you have that all figured out now. The security, the material things and all. My grandchildren, the dog you always wanted and a private jet. Most of all a loving husband, if you had wanted that. You lost the lot entirely through your actions, decisions and lack of understanding.

So Orlando it is for us. Being there this weekend thru Tuesday will stir a few memories, but only a few.

In the meantime here are a few photos that are not all about the beauty of the naked female form :) Women figure in some though - some personal, some for clients.


The first two are personal, but that doesn't take too much imagination...;-)

This lady really took to Ben so she let me take her photo.

Part of a fashion shoot for Ash

Diamonds really are forever...in this case

Another very personal shot..Paris enjoying the view. Both of us!

USA.... enjoying the view

Northern Italy

USA

And finally, is this a just a client shot or.....

Ciao - 'have a nice day lady', as the man once said. Me, I'm about to 'Sail on a summer breeze'

Life

LL

Lives lived and not lived.

Ten, no, nearly eleven years have passed since we parted. When you were in a more vitriolic mood you mentioned boredom and me in the same breath. One of the weaker reasons you gave for your infidelity (ies).

Fact is ma'am your 'life' of weekends, occasional holidays to the same places and dwelling on what you eat, to me, is far more boring than the life you could have led.

In those 10-11 years I have climbed glaciers, visited volcanoes, aqua dived on the Great Barrier Reef, learnt Italian, and improved my other languages - French, German and Spanish. I've been everywhere from China to New Zealand, from Barbados to all of Europe. None of that includes the internal trips in my home country - the USA. The cars the boats and the plane are just means to an end, but make life quite pleasurable.

I have friends you never heard of (because I never introduced you to them), grandchildren who are at the center of my life, Ben my dog, the ranch and horses in New England and the means to do whatever I wish. I wouldn't call any of that boring - would you!

My life is rich (as is my bank account!) and enriched by the people around me, most of all by my wife. That position was yours once, but you were too indecisive, impulsive and wayward.

I get reports on your life from time to time and it all sounds quite mundane, repetitive and far from the excitement you once told me you craved.

I wasn't going anywhere as I told you long ago in the States - you were and that's what destroyed 'us'. That was, and is, your loss, in the main. You did me an enormous favor.

I'm reminded of black and white. My white shirt and black dressing gown. Long gone, I'm sure,  but I still have a photo of the former... You thought things were black and white when you believed you had left, but they weren't. It was not as 'clean cut' as you imagined. That is you decided to go and thought that is what you did. You didn't - I had already 'gone'. You lost me pretty much back in 2004 around March of that year. You must have thought I was born yesterday when you carried on as though nothing had happened.

You know what the most amusing thing is - the same has happened to you since you went your own way. Not everything in your garden is rosy. I find that funny, sad and ironic. You are blind to many things and none more so than those quite close to you. If you betrayed my trust what makes you think others can't do the same to you...and have.

Food for thought. You chose your bed... Me, you could have trusted me to the ends of the Earth, but you thought everyone lived by your standards. They don't.

Ciao

Conscience

For LL

Conscience, now there's an interesting concept viz a viz you LL. Here's the definition...

Conscience is an aptitude, faculty, intuition or judgment that assists in distinguishing right from wrong. Moral judgment may derive from values or norms (principles and rules).

Difficult to see how you fit into that meaning, isn't it. 

Your morals must be hidden deep in your conscience as the immoral side was right up front. Then there's theft. That is just plain wrong. You committed both immorality and theft and they should be weighing on your conscience. You rationalize most things by pretending to forget them and/or burying them deep inside you, so that with an 'apparent' clear conscience you can get on with what you call your life. You may forget these things but others haven't.... remember this...the one item you didn't steal.

You had admiration and respect at one time but your lack of principles and values destroyed that. You deserved what happened and you deserved the fact that you weren't the only one sharing me, after my discoveries. I kept that from you the same way you kept what you were up to from me. The difference being that I didn't look elsewhere until I discovered your infidelity. How does it feel to now know that you were playing second fiddle? About the same way it felt for me, I bet. All water under the bridge now but it's good to remind you from time to time.

Back in London now and joined by my good buddies and their wives from the States tomorrow for a week of fun. All staying at our place in Knightsbridge.

Then toward the end of the month the two us start our usual European sojourn, starting in.....Spain. I understand you will be there at the end of the month, so you never know...paths may cross. We are being joined later by our families including Tom who is now close to completing his term in the USMC. He's now a light colonel (Lieutenant Colonel). Several grandchildren - well seven in all - will be joining us as well as N's latest 'bump' due in June. - four of the seven are from my side of the family. They are all a joy. You have missed out on so much. That's apart from all the homes, travel, cars, boats and private jet. See below (admittedly, I've changed some of the cars):

Your decision and one you realized straight after, was the wrong one. I agree. You had that chance in early 2006 and you lacked the courage to take it. The same way you lacked the courage to face me. They call that cowardice where I come from.

So overall I guess it was me that had the close shave...not you.

You chose the mundane life, the life spent in virtually the same places every weekend for the past nearly 11 years, a life spent with a partner with no neck and a girth as wide as he is high. What a choice!

We are both looking down the short side of the hill now, but at least my life is fulfilled, happy and full of contentment. I can't say the same applies to yours...and I know more than you realize ;-)

Ciao

PS You have never had the courage to make contact I either...I don't bite. Not these days anyway. :))))